Posted on

Promoting Self Esteem In Children-Be A Good Example



Promoting Self Esteem In Children


Why do you think some children have high self-esteem while others have low self-esteem? When you were a child was your parents and family a good example, as children we take in everything we observe in our family especially from our parents. I truly believe positive happy parents raise positive happy children, when your a child and everything you do your parents only pay attention to your mistakes it has to be a major factor in your own self-esteem. I grew up never being able to do anything right in the eyes of my father, he always seen what I did wrong never praising me for what I did right. I grew up feeling I was pretty much worthless, why even try when your only going to fail.


promoting self esteem in children


Four Main Factors In Self Esteem


Positive Healthy Relationships

Personal Abilities

Self Worth



building self esteem in children


Positive Healthy Relationships


I truly feel this is the most important factor of them all to get a good start in building your child’s self esteem, when my sons were just boys I treated them like my best friends. I think treating your children as equals, will give them a boost in their self esteem. You can enforce what you need to teach your children to grow up to have good self esteem by making them feel their worth your time and effort and you look forward to spending your time with them. Anyone can be a father, but it takes a bigger man to be a real dad.


self esteem in children


Personal Abilities


The personal abilities of every child is very important for their self esteem, one way is to give your children the options to make some decisions on their own. Of course you need to guide them, but this will give a child much pride in themselves especially if they make good healthy decisions parents praise them for.  Encouragement is very important as well, encouraging your child to try new things will help him learn new skills plus learn making mistakes is not always a bad thing. Do not make a big deal of your child’s mistakes, my father did this and I was terrified most my life to take any risks in fear of making a mistake.


child self esteem


Self Worth


Every child wants to feel they are worth your time, spending time  with your children doing fun activities is a great self esteem booster for them. If you as a parent enjoy the time you spend with your child, your child will feel this. Quality time is very important for you and your child to form a close bond, be a friend to your child that is really all any child wants from you. Introducing your child to new interest and hobbies during your quality time is very beneficial to your child, most children will form an interest in most things when they are sharing it with their parents.


building self esteem in children




Be a coach to your child, encouraging your child to do new things is very important. Focus on your child’s accomplishments when doing new things, never focus on their failures. Praise them often , but do not over praise them too often. When I was a child I never wanted to try anything new, I was so terrified of making a mistake I could not enjoy new experiences. Low self esteem results in an anxious child, an anxious child is rarely a happy child and this is just not how childhood should be.


motivating your child


Final Thought


I have shared my own personal formula I used to raise my three sons, my sons now are full grown young men. I am very proud of how they have grown up, even though we do not live close in distance I know we are together in each other’s hearts. I  hope this article and resources benefits you or someone you know, anyone needing to talk I am always available by leaving a comment or writing me directly.




16 thoughts on “Promoting Self Esteem In Children-Be A Good Example

  1. My son is very young now, but I am constantly worrying if I am doing enough to make sure he grows into the man the world needs. Thanks for the links to a few books on this subject. It’s important to raise men who are confidant, encouraged, and can create a better environment and be a role model for those around them.

    1. Thank You Ash

      I am sure your doing a fine job raising your son, but if in doubt it never hurts to read some good resources or even discuss the matter with someone you trust.


  2. Self esteem in children is extremely important. I did not have high self esteem as a child and even less of it as a teenager. I look back at those years and wonder how in the world I survived those years. If I had believed in myself more back then, I can only imagine how my life would be different now, but that’s not to say things are bad now, but I do wonder if I could’ve already had some of the things I really wanted in life and still yearn for. Excellent article and examples of promoting self esteem for children!

    1. Thank You Brian

      I also wonder if I had not had the childhood I had with anxiety how much different my life would be as well, I suppose its best we just try to focus on the present and not think too much about the past.


  3. Childhood is so difficult. I have a number of unpleasant memories from my childhood. But, I also have many pleasant memories also. Childhood definitely provided the adult I am today and it turned out to be pretty good.


    1. Thank You Bobby Williams

      I am sure most people have positive and negative experiences in your childhood,
      I also feel there are more children who grew up in an abusive family then
      people realize.


  4. I really do like and appreciate this post. This is a very serious topic and one that a lot of parents can learn from. Growing up I seen were one child is favored over another and I can tell you, there is nothing more damaging to a child’s self worth and self-esteem as not feeling loved and appreciated by their own parent. I it so easy to mess up our children. As parents and as individuals we need to be mindful of our actions.

    1. Thank You Reneea

      Your comment is so right about we need to think before we do things especially around our children, I would do things differently of course if I had my sons childhood to do over.


  5. Hi, I don’t have children but I do have a toy poodle i’m looking after with my girlfriend. I could relate to your post right away because we are training our dog with positive reinforcement feedback. we encourage him for all the things he does right. if he does something wrong we tell him no and then encourage him the way we want him to behave. even when we took him to the vet, she told us how mailable his brain and experiences are at this age. All creates need to feel that worth and love.
    Great post!

    1. Thank You Steven

      It is true dogs are very much like children, they respond much better to positive feedback rather then negative. Children want to please their parents, sometimes they just have trouble and it could be anxiety.


  6. I totally agree wholeheartedly with this article, because a lot of children dont have self esteem based on what goes on in their family homes which is a very big shame. We as society should see all children as out own and try to promote self esteem and positive societal values where we can

    1. Thank You Jazzy

      I appreciate you reading another of my article while on my website today, I do gear many of my article on the children because I really had a bad childhood with my anxiety. If I can help some children through my articles I will be more then happy, children deserve to be happy and enjoy their childhood.


  7. Where was this post when I was growing up? hahaha. Anyways nice looking article Jeff. Would these books also be useful to someone who doesn’t have kids yet? I don’t have kids myself (as far as I know…), but would these benefit me if I got them right now as well?

    1. Thank You Nigel

      Nice to hear from you, these books are just geared for people with children so they can use techniques which would work well with children. They would work for anyone, they are just written for the benefit of children because children and grown adults do not always react the same.


  8. hey jeff,
    i am still single but i do agree with you that the kids’ dad and mom plays a big role in shaping their behaviour and personality of the kids. if the kids are exposed to happiness and politeness then soon, they will be shaped onto that path and the opposite thing might also happen,thus i can see that parents take a lot of responsibility for making their kids a better person.

    1. Thank You lzzul

      Parenting needs to be taken more serious today, especially with people having children at a younger age today. Amazing I grew up quite well mannered because of my mother, but my father gave me some negative experience which has haunted me over the years but I am overcoming that brain washing today.

      Weather positive or negative, our parents influence us during our childhood more then many people realize.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *