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Be Popular In High School-How This affects A Teenager

 

 

You Are Not A Child Anymore

 

When a teenager starts high school often this is the beginning of new experiences,  new experiences are one of the major triggers of anxiety issues in teenagers. This is the point in every child’s life where major changes happen very quickly for them, this is where a child goes from being a child to a young adult. When you start high school often you are separated from your old friends from grade school and junior high, often this is where your childhood friends and you have chosen different paths in your studies.

 

Teenage Stress

 

High School Stress

 

In my opinion and from my own experience, high school was when my anxiety issues became the most severe and even new issues had begun. Most teenagers in high school have not developed any coping skills mainly because they have not been exposed to any amount of constant stress,  this is where the most healthy children adjust  to their new lifestyle.  For any children whose parent had realized,  they had emotional problems and helped them learn to cope when a child will be much better prepared for young adulthood.  I highly recommend any parents reading this article seriously consider developing good coping skills in your children at a young age, this is just smart preparation for your child’s future.

 

High School Stress

 

High School Popularity

 

Being popular and well liked with tons of friends in high school is very important to many teenagers, when I was in high school I preferred to not stick out so being popular was not something I cared all that much about. I grew up in a rural farm area, being a loner was nothing new to me so the lack of attention from the other students did not affect me. My anxiety issues at this time were already affecting my life, I already had low self-esteem and being the center of attention was not pleasant for me. I was luckier than many other students with similar issues, I was not one of the non-popular kids which the school bullies chose to pick on. I also had an anxiety disorder called “Selective Mutism”, which went along with my social anxiety problems. This disorder caused me to talk very seldom when in social settings, it was not that I chose not to talk. With this disorder you become so severely anxious you are not able to communicate well in social settings, it;s like your brain goes dead you can not think of anything to say.

 

Selective Mutism

 

Gender And Popularity

 

Since I was not one of the popular kids in high school this part of my article will be from my research, being popular has its positive and negative sides. It seems being popular is more important to teenage girls than teenage boys, a common fact is teenage girls experience more stress in high school to be in the right groups and a part of the right crowd. Girls at this age are more vulnerable to worrying about acceptance and being popular, having a large network of friends for girls is something they seem to need in high school. The majority of the boys has a smaller network of friends, boys just are not as social as girls at this age.

 

Stress In Genders

 

Characteristics Of Popular Kids

 

I have learned through life there is always a positive and negative side to everything we experience, healthy teens will automatically see the positive side of being one of the popular kids in high school.  I realize now I did everything within my power not to be popular in high school, just the thought of being the center of attention brought out many anxious feelings and thoughts in me. Even though I had a small network of classmates who considered me a friend, in my eyes I had no real friends these kids were just classmates to me. These are some of the characteristics the popular kids in high school seemed to have going for them, many of these kids put on a good act despite how they really felt on the inside.

 

 High Self-Esteem

Confident

Leaders

Happy Go Lucky

Extroverted

Responsible

Perfect Students

Healthy

Social Butterflies

Above Average Appearance

Well Dressed

Well To Do Family Lifestyle

 

Teen Anxiety Disorders

 

Characteristics Of The Not So Popular  Kids

 

Believe it or not, there is a negative side of being one of the popular kids in high school. Once you create this image you have a lot of pressure on you to keep that image all through high school. Most these kids put a lot of extra pressure on themselves just to have this image, they are expected to be positive role models to the rest of the school. They have much pressure on them to be perfect students in every way, they are especially looked up to by the students who are not in their social class. Crazy when you think about putting all that extra stress in your young life just to be popular, here is a list of the characteristics of the not so popular kids.

 

Average Appearance

Low Self-Esteem

Introverted

Anxious

Less Social

Quiet

Soft Spoken

Followers Or Loners

Average Dress

Average Family Status

 

Low Self-Esteem

 

High School Stress Symptoms

 

High school is stressful enough without putting more stress on yourself than you really need too, joining all the right clubs and being with the right crowd can cause teenagers more stress then they are able to handle without good coping skills.  Deep breathing exercises and relaxation techniques are something every person should know and understand, these are exceptionally required to be able to cope with the stress we will be exposed to the rest of our lives. Some of the symptoms teenagers have shared they experience in high school from stress are.

 

Depression

Anxiety

Overwhelmed

Lack Of Concentration

Memory Problems

Irritable

Unhappy

Negative Feelings & Thoughts

Low Self-Esteem

Lack Of Motivation

Loss Of Interests

Numb Feelings

Headaches

Stomach Aches

Loss Of  Appetite

Overeating

Cravings

 

Positive Attitude

 

Is Popularity Worth It

 

If I had it to do all over would I wish to be one of the popular kids in high school ? I would not recommend any high school student change who they really are just to be popular. The right groups and the right crowd with a large network of friends, now are all those people in your network actually your friends? For most teenager’s if  they are lucky one or two people might be true friends in their entire network ,  just be yourself and save so much unneeded stress while in high school.  If you insist on creating a high image to be popular,  you better prepare yourself and learn good coping and relaxation skills.

 

Self Worth

 

Fun Product Of The Day

 

Since this is an anxiety-free website, it only makes sense to me to provide you one fun product on each article to brighten your day. This is my way of giving you something positive each day before you leave my website, stay positive and have a great day.

 

tshirt

 

What Is On My Mind Today

 

My article today is to help parents and teenagers realize how serious high school stress is for young adults, you must find good methods to cope with your stress. Being well liked is something we all desire no matter our age, but really if you’re going to have to be someone else and be involved in activities and groups your not really  into what is the sense. Please take care of your emotional health, the mind is so important for you to be able to function and enjoy the things you in your life.

 

 


 


Coloring for Grown ups

14 thoughts on “Be Popular In High School-How This affects A Teenager

  1. You’re right, stress in high school is just as important and energy consuming as stress at work. Parents tend to forget that teens are becoming adults and this is a huge change. This is probably the biggest change one goes through in his life. All that new freedom comes with responsibilities which is something that kids don’t have to deal with. Thanks for this great post and I love the quotation you added, they bring hope to both parents and teens.

    1. Thank You Carolyn

      I am happy you found my article today, appreciate your comments very much. Most anxiety & disorders are triggered in teens in high school, many parents do not understand this.

      Jeff

  2. Hi There,
    I found your assessment of high school popularity vs. emotions intriguing. I went to a very small high school so there wasn’t nearly as much competition and popularity issues. All of my 36 classmates were friendly toward one another and we participated in extra curricular activities together. My best friend at the time was a cheerleader and in the band during high school. I know look back and realize how good we had it. I am hopeful that when my children come along they can be part of a similar social circle, but if not I hope I will have the wisdom to prepare them whether they are deemed “popular” or not.

    1. Thank You Shelby,

      When I was in high school stress was not nearly as high as it is now, my sons attended the same high school as me and the stress level on them were more than myself. There is much more violence in the schools today, more drugs floating around as well where I live than when I was a kid.

      Jeff

  3. I can identify myself as one of the not so popular kids in high school. Looking back, I think it is so important to have family support and love to overcome feelings of low self esteem and daily stress. It is also very important to identify and know who your real friends are whether as a teenager or an adult.

    1. Thank You Yvonne,

      I appreciate you reading and commenting on my article, being not so popular in high school is not a bad thing. At the time we are in high school many people do see this as the most important thing in their life at that time, yes family and your true friends are what is most important in life at any age.

      Jeff

  4. I agree high school is a stressful time for teenagers. I find it interesting and can definitely believe that girls are under more pressure to be in the right groups. I wonder if that correlates to more girls quitting sports. I feel like it’s not only trying to fit in though, but schools constantly testing students, trying to push the students to be ready for college (by choosing a major), and the rest of their lives which creates untold anxiety. Thanks for the great information!

    1. Thank You Immamanc,

      Thank you for reading my article and commenting, I do feel teenage girls need to be accepted and part of a larger network of friends than guys do.

      Jeff

  5. Great article! As a mother of 3 already grown I have seen what all this can do and wish I knew more of the signs for my kids!

    When I was in high school I was the non popular and I was short so I was bullied. This is where I learned to stick up for my self and put on a front of being strong and aggressive to protect myself from further bullying. (Good and Bad)

    I never wanted to be popular but I wanted to be left alone so I could just be me. However, I never went through the same stresses that the kids now a days face.

    This post is will for sure help parents be able to identify and understand what a teenager goes through!

    Cheers
    Nichole

    1. Thank You Very Much Nicole,

      I thank you very much for sharing your past with all of us, being a victim so young to bullying has to be quite a horrible experience. I was lucky I was not picked on in school, I really did not realize girls got bullied until now. I do hope this opens some parents eyes, most teenagers are not going to share with their parents many of their experiences in high school with anxiety and being bullied.

      Jeff

  6. I was never popular in high school or unpopular for that matter. I went to three different high schools, and I think most of my stress came from always being the new kid, the one that nobody knew. I did do sports and that helped me meet people and gain friends. I think that parents should help with coping skills and then, NOT move your children around during high school. It is such an important time, and we meet friends we have for life. I didn’t get any of that….

    1. Thank You Matt’s Mom

      Moving around would be a great trigger for stress , anxiety and depression as a teenager. I wonder if this is more difficult for a girl or boy at that age? I went to the same school my entire school days, was not popular and was not picked on so i got through school pretty lucky actually.

      Jeff

  7. Hello, thanks for encouraging article. Nowadays more and more adults understand that being in the school is not so funny as it was many years ago.
    I guess that social media has enormous influence.
    Nobody paid attention if you were shy or did not look great as leaders at the class.
    Today messages and pictures can reach every corner in the world.
    Your website is the actual and valuable source to those who want feel good and safe being themselves, without copying somebody.
    Keep up great work, all the best, Nemira.

    1. Thank You Nemira,

      I appreciate your comment, I think even today some parents forget what it was like being a teenager in high school. Maybe some parents were the popular students, in that case they would not understand being unpopular or even picked on would be like.

      Jeff

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